


The definition of unconventionality

by popnographic



Category: Free!
Genre: Except there's no hair pulling, Haru is Sousuke's kitchen assistant, Haru just makes sure his bf presents edible food to their guests, It's basically Ratatouille, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-14
Updated: 2015-07-14
Packaged: 2018-04-08 21:16:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,373
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4321032
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/popnographic/pseuds/popnographic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Makoto and Rin discover the secret behind Sousuke's cooking skills as they're invited over to dinner at the Nanase/Yamazaki household and witness Haruka's and Sousuke's... unusual... kitchen activities.</p><p>[Based on Tumblr user <b>iskabee</b>'s <a href="http://iskabee.tumblr.com/post/123699427030/it-is-sort-of-alarming">comic</a>. I really couldn't help myself.]</p>
            </blockquote>





	The definition of unconventionality

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ishka](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ishka/gifts).



"Do you think Haru's gonna be cooking, or Sousuke?"

Makoto hums. "I don't actually know. And it doesn't really matter to me, they're both pretty good at cooking, and I like what they both make."

"Please don't tell me you actually enjoyed having  _mackerel_ whenever you had dinner at Haru's before Sousuke moved in", Rin says and shudders.

Honestly, that's one of the good things about the two of those having gotten together and Sousuke moving in with Haru; the fact that you aren't fed on a strict mackerel only diet when you're invited over for either lunch or dinner. At least that's what Rin thinks, but apparently Makoto's of a different opinion. He's just biased, really, having been best friends with Haru since they were very young. Or maybe Haru actually turned him onto mackerel with his weird merman powers.

Makoto, however, doesn't dislike Haru's cooking, and he hasn't actually gotten tired of eating mostly mackerel when visiting his best friend. Today, he's got this weird intuition that tells him they won't be served mackerel for some reason, but maybe that's just him thinking Sousuke's managed to convince his boyfriend to not serve their guests fish for once.

The two of them approach Haru's old house, which has now by association also become Sousuke's, and Rin gets the honours of ringing the doorbell. Neither of them are used to having to do this, since back when Haru lived alone, the door was always unlocked and you could just walk in. It's always surprised Rin how Haru's yet to have a break-in or get robbed. Well, now that he lives with Sousuke who actually locks doors after himself, Haru has one thing less to be concerned about. If he ever  _was_ concerned about that in the first place, Rin highly doubts.

"What— oh, it's just  _you_ two", Haru says upon opening the door, and Rin gives Makoto a pointed look.

"This is how he greets us when they're the ones who invited us to dinner. Where are the manners?"

Makoto laughs a little. "Just leave it. Hi, Haru. Sorry for intruding."

Haru shrugs and lets them in, after which Rin and Makoto enter the hallway and take their shoes off, and Haru doesn't even wait for the two of them before he returns inside. Makoto hears the shuffling of Haru's feet until they suddenly stop, and then he hears a soft ' _oomph_ '-sound, and he frowns, concerned.

"It sounds like something happened out there. Should we go and check? That sounded like Sousuke."

Rin shrugs. "We're going inside, anyway. Rude of Haru to not wait for us, though."

The two of them walk into the living room, but Haru isn't there, either, and neither is Sousuke. They exchange puzzled glances, but that's when they hear voices in the kitchen. Two voices, to be more specific.

"... a little more salt, right?"

"Yeah."

"Oi, are  _both_ of them cooking?" Rin asks Makoto, lightly elbowing him in the side. Makoto shrugs, looking equally as confused as Rin feels. "Do we dare go inside? I'm surprised they're not yelling at each other."

The brunet raises his eyebrows in a ' _I don't know_ ' kind of way, and Rin decides to take the risk in walking into the kitchen, Makoto close behind him as if he's  _scared_ or something. Well, Rin doesn't actually know what to expect and what could possibly entail in there, so he decides to go inside with slight precaution but no other thoughts beforehand. So what, maybe they're just cooking together — it's perfectly normal for couples to do so.

That is, if 'normal couples' actually included Sousuke and Haru, which Rin is pretty sure it doesn't.

When Rin and Makoto enter the kitchen, what they see is far from what either one of them could've ever dreamt of seeing. Rin drops his jaw, and Makoto just stares at them, dumbfounded. Sousuke's walking around gathering spices from the cabinets, stirring in the pot and tossing vegetables in a pan — and Haru's sitting on his back. Both of the guests are too stunned by the sight to say anything, and that's probably why Haru's still sitting on Sousuke's back and not sitting with his ass on the floor. Rin knows Sousuke would probably be absolutely  _mortified_  if he found out they'd been seen.

Haruka reminds them of a koala that way, with his legs wrapped around Sousuke's middle, both arms over Sousuke's shoulders, and the taller man's left hand holding up Haru's leg to make sure he doesn't fall down. Makoto can't help but find it cute, though; it's another one of those things that shows them just how close Haruka and Sousuke have become — compared to how they were in their last year of high school, they're practically married now. Actually, that probably isn't too far from the truth.

Several very long seconds having passed, Makoto finally breaks the silence. "Well... this is something I never thought I'd see."

Sousuke turns his head around, and he nods in acknowledgement of his guests' arrival. "Hey, welcome. Make yourselves at home, or something. Surprised you haven't already."

"What... the hell?" Rin blurts out. "You're completely unfazed by the fact that we've seen you like this? _You_ , Sousuke?"

His best friend shrugs in response. "Nothing out of the ordinary. We cook like this a lot."

"Are you jealous, Rin?" comes Haru's voice, and Rin snorts, offended.

"Shut up, Haru — I'm not jealous. Makoto, you'd do that with me, too, right?"

Makoto laughs nervously, feeling awkward about the situation that feels like it's growing tense all of a sudden. "I don't know, I wouldn't want to drop you. And I don't want you to carry me around like that... I'm heavy."

"You're not heavy! Jeez."

The subject is dropped there, and Makoto and Rin are left to just stand and watch their friends go about their business. Soon enough, Sousuke turns around holding up two dishes, and Haru's somehow holding up one himself whilst holding onto his boyfriend with the other. "It's ready", they announce in unison, to which Rin and Makoto once again glance at each other with concern. This is certainly going to be an unforgettable dinner experience, that's for sure.

 

* * *

 

 

What's even more surprising is the fact that their dinner is absolutely delicious. Maybe that's because of their combined efforts?

"Why can't you guys just cook next to each other like other people do?" Rin has to ask, refusing to let this go. Haru wrinkles his nose in disgust, and Sousuke scoffs.

"He'd just get in my way. And I'd probably get in his way, too. This is easier. Come on, it's not  _that_ weird."

Rin's eyebrows skyrocket in disbelief. "It's  _plenty_ weird! Have you ever heard of or seen anyone cook like that? With a damn koala on their back?"

"I'm not a koala", Haru interjects with a disapproving look. Rin just waves him off dismissively, not bothering to argue with him. Sousuke, however, still seems confused as to why they're making such a big deal out of this, and he just shrugs again.

"I haven't. But it works for us, so why not?"

When he's about to say something else, Makoto puts a hand on his arm and laughs a little. "Rin, just let it go. I think it's cute, and I agree with Sousuke, too. If it works for them, then why not? Just don't hurt your back when you're carrying him around like that, Sousuke."

Sousuke rolls his eyes. "Yes,  _mother_."

Haru snorts, and Makoto blushes at the comment. Rin wonders when he'll ever stop being surprised at anything that has to do with Haru and Sousuke. Maybe he'll even have to get used to being shocked at their antics, since it seems like they're full of surprises — the biggest surprise still being the fact that they're dating in the first place.

"Honestly, sometimes I wonder why the hell I'm friends with you guys", Rin says and slaps a hand over his face.

"Because you love us", Haru replies, and it makes Rin's face go beet red within seconds.

"I— oh, shut  _up_ ", he grumbles, knowing he can't come up with a good response on the spot. Haru's right, after all, that bastard.


End file.
